The journey of intimacy with Jesus is a funny thing. And even funnier are the things which move the heart. In recent weeks I have been reading John Donne's poetry again. One poem in particular opens my heart to God and causes me to weep every time I read it, just like it did in High School. Batter My Heart, Three Person'd God, it's called. As I read it again recently it led me down another train of thought that has surfaced lately, which led to another and another and on down the rabbit trails of the heart.....
I started contemplating again the story of Mary of Bethany. How she poured oil on the feet of Jesus in worship. He said of her that this was good as it prepared Him for His burial. That's nice. I so longed to worship Jesus like that. To pour my vial of worship over Him, as it were, weep and wash His tired feet with my hair. But, I mean really, I cannot relate to sweet little gentle kind perfect virginal Mary. So the tendency arises to think with a sigh....yeah, right. Don't I wish. But as I flipped through the various accounts I re-read one in Luke. Here the was no pristine Mary of Bethany. But a whore.
Now, I can relate to a whore. Frankly, we are all more likely to relate to her if we're really honest with ourselves. She, too, poured oil on the feet of Jesus is worshipful abandon, knowing she was not pure and pristine but despised and rejected. Hmmmm. And she also wept, knowing her need of Him, and wiped His feet with her hair. Jesus did not say anything even mildly benign and dull to her but He said she was one who loved much. Wow. That's what I want Him to be able to say to me. That I loved Him much! And He said it not to the pure, seemlingly perfect one to whom I could not relate, but to the whore. I wept for hours. I still weep when I think about it. Truly those who are far less than perfect can come to Him and pour their vial of worship over Him and be told they loved much. How freeing!!
How true throughout life and throughout Scripture. Jesus said it was the ill who needed a doctor not the well. He gave Himself for the poor, the needy, the crippled, the lame...whether physical, emotional or spiritual in nature. He expended Himself. He did not hold back. In fact He says that "the Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, 'Look a glutton and a winebibber, a friend of tax collectors and sinners!". Hm. And we are called to "follow in His steps". We are called to be like Him, to live like Him, to love like Him. Hm.
Rich Mullins, in one of the songs he wrote for the Jesus Record, right before he died, has the following interpretation of this verse: "the whores all seem to love Him and the drunks prepare a toast. And they say 'surely God is with us.' " Jesus ended the thought with wisdom is justified by her children. When was the last time our wisdom in ministry was "justified" because we were hanging out with the broken, the poor, the deranged, the drunks, the demonized, the emotional & spiritual & physical whores, with no thought of the cost to ourselves? When was the last time I was a "libation poured out on the altar" for someone else's faith?
Just a thought. Or two.
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“You don’t think much of me, Nicky,” I said, “but I feel different about you. I love you, Nicky.” I took a step toward him.“You come near me, Preacher,” he said in that tortured voice, “and I’ll kill you.”“You could do that,” I agreed, “You could cut me in a thousand pieces and lay them out in the street and every piece would love you.”
(David Wilkerson from The Cross and The Switchblade)
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